|Shash & La La – 2012|
My baby sister wrote this on her Facebook wall about me today… I wanted to share it with you.
In my life and this journey I have lived, I have had many people come and go in my “close circle”. Kind of like how seasons change so does your close circle. I am fortunate enough to have been born with 3 older sisters and a couple of cousins who have felt more like sisters than cousins and even a foster sister who still loves me 🙂 and I love her! and a couple of life long friends that are more like a sister than otherwise. That is a blessing! Now I have more sister in laws and nieces than I can count 🙂 and I feel the love in my circle has grown! again… I am blessed!Through my trials in the last several years 2 of my sisters have stood by me so closely that at times they were oxygen for me. Just that simple! I can’t imagine going through what I did without them there holding me up. I am forever grateful for them and our bond is forever solidified.One of my sisters came under attack because she was standing so strong beside me… defending me… holding me up… being protective in ways only big sisters can be. She still stood regardless of what the attacks were… and sadly still are!This sister is a Pastor’s Wife… a title I am relieved is not mine to carry! I have watched this sister struggle through things in her teens and then blossom and become this incredible woman she is today! it’s a true transformation that only comes from Grace and understanding forgiveness. I watch her give all of herself all the time to her family and her church family. I see the drain that comes with the title… the unsaid and said expectations others have on her and it literally BLOWS my mind! I do not envy her the title and ALL that comes with it. It makes me question why anyone would ever want to be a Pastor at all?!! they have to live in a glass house and be open to criticizm for every thing they do and don’t do and at the same time try to live in today’s society and raise their children…. did I mention it BLOWS my mind?!So why are we so critical of Pastor’s and Pastor’s Wives? why do we feel we can criticize them so openly and freely and put our own expectations on them? are they to be “past” free? are they never allowed to make mistakes or have real opinions? are they not allowed their own lives? are they not allowed to be like everyone else? this title gives others freedom to judge every action? every word the person says? BLOWS my mind!!!I understand that being a Pastor’s Wife is so much more than a title… I look at her and see my sister… she was my childhood best friend and my childhood tormentor 🙂 and one of the people I love most in this world…. she is kind and giving, generous and compassionate, she understands grace and forgiveness, she is funny and a huge ball of fun, she is outgoing and adventurous… she is a fantastic mom and I get the honor of calling her friend and sister! I am blessed!
|La La and Shash – circa 1975|
To my little La La,
As your big sister, I feel it is my duty to stand up for you against the bullies and meanies in your life. I’m sorry they don’t see you for the beautiful, compassionate, hard-working and generous person that you are and have always been. They are truly missing out! Which is very distressing since they’ll be connected to you for the rest of their lives…
They can call me names, threaten to “expose” the things I did as the vivacious adolescent I was, and call into question the “quality” of Pastor’s Wife I have become. In the best Rhett Butler voice I can muster, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn!”
Looking back, it probably wasn’t the wisest decision to poke the crazy… when my sister’s heart is breaking, it’s so hard to hold my tongue or my tweet.
In the end, the last few years have bolstered our relationship my sweet sister, reinforced a bond that cannot be broken and solidified the fact that this family can’t be messed with. 🙂
I love you lots and lots. Thank you for your wonderful letter today, for showering me with your sentiment and support. I never want to forget what you have said and will use it as a reminder for when those who throw stones come calling.